The Mind and Heart Disconnect
September 2, 2008 Knowing what causes us to suffer (what we tell ourselves) doesn't just make the suffering stop. Neither does understanding intellectually that what happens to us is due to our own karmic actions suddenly mean we no longer get upset when we encounter difficulties.
Intellectually understanding and emotionally reacting are two very different things!
We have the habit of reacting in certain ways. So even though there's this little voice saying “Excuse me, but you're causing your own suffering!” or “This is the result of what you did in the past!” we still act out of those habits accumulated over uncountable lifetimes. And so, acting out of habit, we become angry or afraid or disappointed or whatever.
A few days, I was listening to a translation of Master Chin Kung’s talk by one of my fellow nuns. Teacher was talking about a high level of bodhisattvas who no longer had any thoughts of selfishness, greed, anger, ignorance, or arrogance. But the habit of these afflictions is still there. So even these higher level bodhisattvas still have habits. They do not act on these habits or have thoughts that arise from them, but the traces of the habits still exist.
It is little wonder then that we—beings far less advanced on the path as these bodhisattvas—still act automatically out of habit. Yes, we know but we cannot yet do. We’re still stuck in the duality of mind and heart: the mind calmly understands but the heart still blindly reacts. We have yet to reach the point where there is no separation between knowing and doing.
Reader Comments (12)
I so have to agree with what you've written above. Merely knowing and understanding does not mean that we'll do /not do a certain thing (out of habit).It's definately not easy to "control" our afflictions at times. I guess, everyone of us is still learning; learning to understand the truth, learning to overcome and change our habits, learning to control our thoughts, learning to be mindful etc. That's why we are still here in this saha world. PLUS, human is so forgetful. Despite knowing and understand a certain truth, we still let our habit overpass all and only regret after doing it.Do you think that daily or even hourly reminder to ourself about not repeating our bad habits will work? (eg, if one use to be selfish, and now realise and understand the truth about selfishness remind oneself not to be selfish anymore every now and then.)
Most assuredly yes! The more frequent the reminders to ourselves the better. It seems we easily remember the action from twenty years ago in which someone irritated us, but we can't seen to remember what we told ourselves we would do today for our practice.
I agree and disagree.
I agree that "intellectually understandind and emotionally reacting are two different things." However, 1."We know but we cannot yet do." 2."The mind calmly understands but the heart still blindy reacts." 3. "The point where there is no seperation between knowing and doing." All these points are on a continuum. We first start out wanting to do good. That wish may not seem like much but it is a powerful start. We move from the wish to trying to do some good. Usually with someone we like. Okay we managed to get through "that" with someone we like. (Even though we keep our likes and dislikes to a bare minimum if at all). Then we move into an area where "those" challenging people are located. Where else but in our work place. We try and we try but we don't have to win every battle over our afflictions (craving, anger, jealousy, etc) BUT WE DO HAVE TO TRY and keep TRYING. Being attentive and using our intelligence in being attentive will get us out before we fall in again. We have to be our own emotional gate keeper so to speak.
"There is no way to abide with our dynamic ungrapable emotions if we keep fueling them with thoughts... By steading ourselves BEFORE we're taken over by our emotions we create the causes for peace and joy for us all."
A quote from no time to lose.
anybody
Agreed - the "keep trying" is our practice. Gradually the duality of mind and heart at the level of relative truth are transformed into one at the level of absolute truth.
And to steady ourselves before the emotions take over, we chant "Amituofo."
anybody
Too easily said than done: to just 'use the mind' and to 'keep our likes and dislikes to a bare minimum if at all' - if only it is really that simple?!.
How many of us could seriously said that the mind calmly understand? If that is the case, we would not be where we are today.
Also, could it be the other way round?: that it is the 'heart that calmly understand but the mind that blindly reacts' - and upset our mental equilibrium.
From personal experience, just 'wanting' or wishing to do good is not enough. We may need to understand and acknowledge as to whether we have the real good fortune or not to change for the better (due to our bad habits ingrained in us, from this and past lifetimes) for the better, and not just because we wish it in the mind.
'Being attentive and using our intelligence in being attentive will get us out before we fall in again' would not have work in my case, as intelligence has no place when the mind and the heart are not of one cord and are disconnected due to karmic bad habits that most of us are plagued with. If not, we would have transcend to 'would be saints or sages', are we?!
Maybe, we first need to understand more and to work diligently on how to create good fortune that will help to transcend the heart and mind to beat as one?!.
Action is never preceeded without thought.
All actions are preceeded by thought.
Change the thought change the action. However, this takes time maybe a whole life time or an incredible moment or just an instant.
"Intelligence has no place when the mind and the heart are not of one cord." Interesting...Albert Einstein said insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.
At one time or other I have lived like that and wondered why my life didn't work. Hmmmm Change requires change not coins. (ha ha ha). The heart changes when you are so sure "that" won't work anymore! Hallaluia there is a way out. Getting to "that won't work anymore takes lots of "PRACTICE." I mean living life down to the nitty gritty.
Patients, diligence and just keep showing up no matter what disturbing thing might show itself to get you off track. Showing up is 80-90% of the battle. It is the wish that pushes us! It is the wish that drives us! It is the wish to change that makes the STUFF come together in our mind or in our life.
Remember: Don't stop before your miracle happens and try not to rain on other peoples parade while you wait.
Every journey of a 1,000 miles starts with one step. But before we step off to go we INTEND to go somewhere.
Of course we have hugh Karmic Stones in front of us. But it is our heart of good intentions/ sincerety/ a wish/ that encourages all the forces available to help us to make those changes happen. That force is within... Its in everyone of us!
It is that wish that gives us the Whoa! Get Up and Walk! and take your pallet with you as you stroll by the crowds.
"...disconnected due to karmic bad habits that most of us are plagued with If not, we would have transcended to "would be saints or sages."
Habits are actions. All actions are preceede by thoughts. Over many life times or just one moment it can be done! Change the thought and the behaviors will follow. Behavior is stubborn patients over time is the most necessary element.
Over a life time or an instant or for the most important moment!(like when someone of high influence is yelling at you and you need to be nice when you just want to tell her how wrong she is you stay stopped and in the moment of peace and eternal now, it needs to be in place in those moments!) Not when you need it but when it is absolutley necessary.
Anyway transcendence happens many time during the work week. It is not a Holy Mountain where sages and saints hangout!
(Though i do believe they do hang out in certain places...another train of thought for another time).
It is found in the moment of everyday living, loving and practice. "Being an ordinary person doing ordinary things with the deepest sincerity."
Opps there it is again "sincerety" = "a wish," its everywhere you cannot escape it!
The battering of a butterflys wings contribute to the hurricanes around the world. How much more do our thoughts contribute to our lives.
Again thoughts preceed action. An electrical current runs from your brain through your spinal column sending messages to our body to do everything from blinking our eyes to breathing to getting angry to being in Bliss.
(Oopps bliss another subject for another day)
Really just doing whats in front of oneself is enough in this lifetime. Live Love and Practice. Okay, okay faith vows and practice fits too!
Remember to love yourself.
My wish for you is: be happy and rejoice within your own heart and be free from pain and suffering. On all the levels ever intended and possible.
As far as good fortune. I have the Buddha alive and well that is good fortune. "Do what you love and the rest will follow"= FAITH
Alot has come and gone and in spite of it all I will keep my vow of doing no harm, doing good and living for others. How about you?
anybody
You know, Anybody,
I must applaud you for having so full of high ideals and such conviction to live up to the expectation of such lofty thoughts that are not just based on conjecture.
As for me, I am unable to fit those shoes, and hence the doubting Thomas at work and my skepticism. But, hey, if and when I encounter a true genuine bodhisattva, then that would be a different ball game, wouldn't it?. Who knows, maybe you are one already, to which I bow my hat to you.
Amituofo
Venerable Wuling, kind and gracious and who is a true monastic, to observe her noble silence whilst publishing our strong individualistic viewpoints is truly admirable; but such a high caliber blog of good wholesome teachings should not be used or tainted for any selfish usage of egotistical or arrogance expression.
I am truly sorry.
Amituofo
But anyone who has tried to incorporate this into their actions and speech knows how unbelievably difficult it is. And so we get frustrated, disillusioned, confused; whatever. And we react out of habit. That's hardly surprising since even high level bodhisattvas still have the residue of habits.
I don't know about you, my readers, but I am way down the ladder from high level bodhisattvas. In fact, I'm probably not even on the same ladder. And I find the practice very hard. It's the only path for me and I am so very grateful to have found it. But it's hard. Darned hard.
One of the many ways it's hard is to say "I'm sorry." That takes awareness, humility, and courage. Sure, we can mumble "sorry" but to connect the sorry to "I" is tough. And doing what is tough is what practitioners do.
Now, where was I on that ladder again?
You now know why it is called "PRACTICE." Practice is like a child who practices the piano. It is all practice... we eventually get better with time and practice.
Please do not tip any hats. Coins yes not hats. (ha ha).
Habits sneak up on me all too easily. They come in all sizes like pizza: small, medium, and large. Extra large has reduced somewhat. "Oops, i made a mistake" is all i got to say for myself with a sincere wish to do better next time. i will try better the next time. i am clear to take resposibility (sometimes too much) for the oops and try to be AWARE not to do it again.
TRY is the operative word! Along with sincere.
There is a time lapse in here. Don't think in anyway that this reveals itself like a mathematical equation. It is more like a soap opera long and drawn out episodes; sometimes with reruns, (of habits, different people similar situations over and over again).
Awareness is such a big step! Once we have a glimpse that there is something to fix we can take action. This comes with practice. Practice to do good, avoid evil and be loving to myself (not in a selfish indulgent manner but more in a balanced healthy happy with an inner smile way, a bounce of joy in my steps).
Practice for me includes keeping the name of Amita, Amitabha, Amitoufou, alive and well in my brain plus action to do good, avoid evil, stay relaxed (physically mentally and emotionally) and being happy (content,knowing I have enough even when challenges occur).
Awareness comes with a pause. Increasing that pause you can get a lot done. Keep practicing.
You know all the cliches. They have lasted the test of time because they are true.
"Don't stop before your miracle happens"
"Showing up is 80% of the battle"
"The race is not won to the fastest, swiftest or mightiest but to one who hangs in there the longest."
"Keep on keeping on"
Be Happy, Find your bounce of joy in the name:
Amitoufou,
anybody
One more thought for you: doubting Thomas later became a very strong advocate for JC, (who happened to be about love, peace and joy). Thomas was able to get his own section in the Christian Bible.
Keep the skepticism its part of what drives us to find out for ourselves what REALLY works and what does not!
Amitoufou,
anybody