When others unexpectedly hurt us 

with their words,

return kindness not pain.

Most of us have experienced a trusted friend or a loved one say something so unexpected that we’re stung. Caught off guard, we struggled to respond. 

Perhaps, in trying to react compassionately, we figured that something must have upset the person for her to have spoken so unkindly. And in doing so, she carelessly planted seeds for her future suffering. Not wanting to make things worse, we might have even tried avoidance! 

Instead of dreading another occurrence, we can dedicate merits from our practice to her. Today, after dedicating our merits to adorning the Pure Land, repaying all kindnesses and relieving all suffering, we can add a special dedication to the person causing us distress. Dedicating merits to someone to help them find happiness and live a peaceful life can dramatically change our perspective. 

How so?

It’s hard to remain upset with someone when you just wished for her to find peace and happiness.