Fill the silence—with silence.

Many years ago, I avidly devoured Tony Hillerman’s Jim Chee mysteries. I remember a story about an experienced policeman saying that when he questions suspects, he will just remain quiet. Unable to take the silence, most would start talking. And what the police needed to learn would soon be divulged. 

How embarrassingly true! 

What is it about silence that so many people find so uncomfortable? It’s as bad as putting a compulsively neat person in a messy room with “Don’t Touch Anything” signs. The room will surely be organized in record time. Likewise, a compulsive talker just needs to do his thing: fill the room with audio clutter. 

Just because someone else isn’t talking is not an invitation for us to fill the airwaves with whatever comes to mind. 

Does the other person really want to hear about our childhood, past relationships, health status? We may deem them important or interesting. But most likely, they’re not really worth sharing with one and all.