Often, others see the benefits of our practicing Buddhism before we do.

Find contentment in the action, 

not the result.

Let’s face it; there’s not a lot in life we have control over. We may do our best to win in a game, but if others play more skillfully, our dream of a win will end up in disappointment. We may propose a solution to a problem at work, but if another one is selected, here too, we’ll be disappointed. 

By placing our hopes for happiness on attaining our desired result, we’re setting ourselves up for a lot of unhappiness. There’re too many external variables that will factor into the various outcomes. 

Just too many things beyond our control.  

But what if, instead, we focus on what we can control? 

For example, playing our utmost or being super creative with the solution? Knowing that we did our best, we’ll find satisfaction in having done so. We can then view winning the game or being congratulated on our brilliant solution as icing on the cake.

Reasons we are reborn as a family: kindness, revenge, and debts.

It’s never too late to apologize.

We were discussing the importance of apologizing when a practitioner told me of one apology he made many years before. 

When he was ten years old, an older relative invited him to see some books. While looking around the shelves, the young boy took a comic. As he grew from a boy to a teenager to a man, he replayed that moment over and over. Ten years ago, he met the daughter of that older relative for the first time in forty years. 

And he admitted his theft. 

I can only imagine the lifting of the weight of guilt his admission brought about. Apologizing can be breathtaking. Only after we apologize can we appreciate the weight of guilt we had been carrying. Will the intense feeling of relief last forever? No. It will likely only linger a few hours, days if we are lucky. 

But the memory of our relief will remain. Maybe we won’t remember exactly what it felt like, but we will not forget how great it was. How relieved, how happy, we had felt. That memory can spur us to apologize again. And again.