When we try to help others, we can keep in mind and try to practice the Four Integrative Methods that Bodhisattvas use to approach and help people.
The first method is giving what others like, which is a way to establish a good affinity and amicability with others. Once we have earned the confidence of others with our sincere wish to be of help, then what we say or do will create a positive effect on them and they will be open to our suggestions.
The second method is affectionate speech. This does not mean we use glib or flattering speech to sway others. Affectionate speech means to act with flexibility with others and to help them to be comfortable.
The third method is conduct benefiting others. This means that our words and actions must be truly beneficial to others.
The fourth and last method is co-operation with and adaptation of oneself to others. This is to participate in the same activities as others and to be a good example to guide them.